Lately I am noticing a common theme between my girlfriends. We look at all the women in our lives, sometimes on tv/internet, and try to mimic them. Not all of them just the parts we lack and want to be better in. It's not a horrible idea but then again, it doesn't just stop there. We then start to compare ourselves and then we start to be down on ourselves because we aren't as clean as this person or on top of things as this person or cook amazingly cheap healthy meals like this person, or a savvy shopper like this person. We nit pick ourselves to a point that we are now no longer happy with who are currently, who were were in the past, and not sure its achievable in the future. Some will become depressed and some will try harder to succeed and will. Others will just give up. But we never ever stop comparing ourselves to those women. We constantly watch them and see how they do things and we constantly try to better ourselves like them.
God has called me to be a mom. But didn't really give me a rule book or manual on what exactly that means. So I always pictured that I would have my house clean, on top of laundry all the time, making healthy meals, and always doing different activities with my kids daily! Then reality hit and that is so not me or how I do things! My house is usually a mess, one we are trying to control, my kids could probably kill themselves on a toy in their room cause we always forget to have them clean up before bed, laundry is usually in a pile at the foot of my bed, the clean laundry that is, and my kitchen is definitely not something I want to cook in sometimes and forget healthy! I just want cheap to make sure my budget will last! But, my kids are happy, and healthy, and my hubby still loves me and helps when he can. Sure we would like things to be different and we are currently working on it but I found that when I compared myself to friends who 'had it together' I was making myself crazy!! They have it together usually cause they have been that way before they had kids and got married! I wasn't that way even when alone!! My friends and family who know me and love me for me don't care that my room is a mess or that my house isn't spotless! They enjoy themselves regardless. I need to stop comparing myself to everyone else and realize that I am good enough. I am exactly who God wants to mother my children and be a wife to my husband. He put Jake in my life for a reason. Everything came together for our relationship to happen. And the same with our two soon to be three beautiful children! I am exactly where I am suppose to be and while I am not perfect and by no means have it all together, I am good enough for my family. And I will strive to be a better me, not you or anyone else. Me. because I am good enough!
1 comment:
I am super slow at reading blogs, sorry!
To end on a positive note, I will share my counter-argument first. :)
While I agree that we compare ourselves to others too much, I do think there is something to be said for striving to improve oneself. Shrugging and saying, "Welp, I can't change that because this is who I am!" only works when you're talking about your height or how big your feet are or what your primary love language is. To look at your habits or interests or place in life and say, "Nope, can't do anything about that!" is naive and closed-minded. I think observing how others have struggled with and overcome challenges, or how they handle certain things in life can be VERY helpful in making positive changes in our own lives.
That said...
I totally understand what you're saying and admire you for claiming who you are and acknowledging that YES, it IS good enough. You were made the way you are for a reason, and God does NOT make mistakes. Some things you just shouldn't change. :)
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